Lately, when you open fashion magazines, you don’t just see celebrities, models, and fashion industry stars—you also see a handful of fashion bloggers, immortalized in their streetstyle perfection. They are so famous now.
Why can’t you be?
Lusting power, fame, and money is centuries-old, though lust seems to have afflicted men more than women until recent times. But the Internet changed all that. Now we have real-time virtual voyeurism, unprecedented access to the lives of the rich and famous. Being bombarded by imagery of fame and excess everywhere—online, on TV, on our phones, in the grocery store checkout line—ain’t doin’ a thang to temper our lust. As I wrote in my post on greed, we always. Want. More.
And when you see that everyday-girl-who-is-now-a-famous-blogger? If she can do it, why can’t you?
So you start checking your numbers obsessively. How many visits did you have yesterday? You need new followers! And Facebook likes…maybe you should purchase an ad. Why aren’t my numbers getting bigger?, you think. You start adding a million hashtags to every Instagram photo thinking they’ll catch an eye, and some followers, too. You tweet the “big” bloggers, hoping for some attention that might propel you to the upper blogosphere. Everything you do is all about the blog, to the exclusion of your job, relationships, and well-being.
Absolution: JUST BE HAPPY
So how do you curb that lust for blog fame? Be happy with where you are, at this moment. Instead of focusing on what you don’t have, focus on what you do have. Since that’s easier said than done, here are a few tips…
How to be happy, NOW:
- Come to terms with the fact that most of us are NOT famous bloggers!
And most of us will never be! So you are not alone. Most of us are not jet-setting, shooting spots for morning TV shows, or sitting front row at fashion shows. We’re working, taking care of our families, and rationing (or rationalizing) our funds for seasonal clothing/accessory purchases.
- Stop looking at your numbers, right this minute.
What’s the point of looking at them if they make you feel bad? And honestly, if you gained 300, 500, 1,000 followers overnight, how is it really going to change your life? I can promise you one thing: when you reach your golden years, you won’t be wishing you had had more followers. You will wish you had done more, loved more, experienced more while you were vibrant, young, and able.
- Focus on what you have achieved.
If you have even one reader, that’s one more than when you started. If you have one follower, that’s one more than when you started. If you have mastered the tech aspects of blogging, and learned the finer points of social media, you have grown. That is an achievement.
- Consider your blog a community, not a conduit to fame.
All those people showering you with nice comments and likes? They’re your virtual friends, people you may never have met without your blog. They want to interact with you, because they like you, they really, really like you! So stop trying to claw your way to the top and just start connecting. I’ve made some incredible friends through blogging, and they mean more to me than money or freebies ever could. When you need support, they will lift you up. I promise.
- Do only what makes you happy.
I am not a DIYer, a baker, a photographer, a decorator, or a graphic artist. I am a writer. That’s my gift. That’s my love. So instead of beating myself up because my photos suck or because I can’t make beautiful cooking videos, I focus on honing what I know I can do: write. And that’s what you should do: whatever it is that makes you happy. And stop forcing yourself to do anything that doesn’t!
- Stop blogging.
I’m serious. If you’re so concerned with followers, revenue, and growth, and you feel worse since you started blogging, then maybe you should just stop. Quit. Shutter the blog. You can still interact with your blog friends even if you don’t have a blog of your own. You can still be inspired and pin things and play on Instagram and be part of a virtual community without the pressure (or expense) of a full-blown blog. Sounds kind of good, doesn’t it? The point is to enjoy blogging. If it’s making you sick or destroying your relationships, it might be time to kiss it goodbye.