Links à la Mode: IFB Weekly Roundup, June 30

Hey blogger. Get over yourself. Seriously.

Edited by Vahni of Grit & Glamour

This week I’m fresh out of love and rainbows, so there will be no kumbaya intro. Doesn’t mean I don’t love y’all, but I have got to tell you that lately, I’m a wee bit peeved by the fame-whoring and big-noting going on in the fashion blogosphere (and Twitterverse). Who of us doesn’t want brand endorsements and blogging fame? We’re all stars in our own right, and there is nothing wrong with ambition. But no one likes a self-absorbed, one-sided braggart. And no one likes an ass-kisser. Period.

Have you given props to someone other than yourself lately? Is every status update about hyping you? Is everything in your life now about the blog? As Emily of Ruby Slipper Journeys wonders in her post, are you capturing reality on your blog or manufacturing it? If any of this sounds like you, you might be on the road to becoming a full-blown fame monster. Maybe it’s time to check yourself.

A Challenge

If you’re destined for blogging fame, it will come through dedication, professionalism, and genuine respect. Through interaction, supporting your community, and authenticity. Let’s take blogging back to its roots. This week’s roundup is chock full of posts teeming with creativity, wit, and wisdom. I challenge you all to not only read and comment on at least 10 blog posts, but to share them as well. Find something that resonates with you and tweet it, like it, stumble it. All those hearts and thumbs up weren’t made just for you.

Links à la Mode: June 30th


Wondering how Links à la Mode works? Read my tutorial: How to Submit a Post to IFB Links à la Mode


  1. The further I’ve gotten into blogging the more you realize it is all about supporting each other. I’m always looking for someone else to follow on twitter so I can RT for everyone else. Love this post. People NeEd to hear it!

  2. *sighing loudly* ALRIGHT… I have to admit that I am somewhat guilty of this. However, I am very new to blogging and I am learning as I go. From this point forward, I will only mention once that I have a new post. (-: My rule of thumb for mentions, RT and links is that 1) I am actually friends with that person via the blogosphere/twitterville/facebook/real lfie; 2) I feel the content will be useful to my followers on twitter (I am learning how to use twitter and how to use it more effectively) and more importantly facebook (my accounts are linked); and 3) I just genuinely like the information the person presents, their products or their personal style etc. I hope this is true of mostly everyone who throws up names etc…

    By the way, the information from this weeks links a la mode are invaluable for bloggers. I think it should be harvested and stored somewhere on the IFB website. I haven’t had the chance to navigate through the site yet (still trying to get through the follow me I’ll follow you back emails…) so I don’t know if the information is already there. But as a new blogger, this infomation is QUITE helpful. For example…I will try to tone down my ANTM posing for my outfit posts *sighing even louder*

    1. Natasha, thank you for your comment. I think your approach is very healthy. I only tweet about new posts once too. Sometimes I RT with a comment, but I don’t like to re-broadcast my posts repeatedly.

      I have found that I’m comfortable RTing/sharing posts by strangers whose writing resonates with me. Not RTing everything is very smart on your part too. I, again, take the same approach. I only share posts I think my readers will appreciate, not everything for the sake of networking. By being selective and not over-tweeting, you not only avoid annoying followers, you become a voice with high respect and credibility. It’s definitely a matter of quality vs. quantity.

      As for the IFB info, yes, I agree the site is quite difficult to navigate and understand. Jennine is aware of my post, but she has never asked to replicate it on her site. If she does, then I’m definitely happy to share!

      Thanks again for your thoughtful comment.

  3. AMEN! I hope bloggers read this and take it to heart. I know I tend to only skim the one-sided braggart blogs and really read through (and comment on) the ones that are real and not manufactured. Thanks for saying what needed to be said 🙂

  4. Really enjoyed this V. I love how, even after more than a year I still have a really good connection with all you bloggers (despite being in and out of blogoshpere!), and I appreciate the support and interaction immensely.

    Emily’s post was pretty interesting, I’m totally over the self-absorbed kind of blogger, especially the ones who do have amazing outfit posts, and have left you one comment and not been back since.

    Forgot to say Kalo mina doll!

  5. Reading this was so refreshing I feel like I won’t need a glass of water for at least 3 days. So there with you–I’m exhausted by the braggadocio and sometimes debate just throwing in the towel all together.

    1. I’ve absolutely felt the same way, Carrie, even very recently. Hang in there! As others have said to me, focus on the positive blogs, on the bloggers who interact and forget the rest!

  6. my perspective on this is a bit different than yours. i tweet my posts 3 times a day. ideally – morning, noon and night. people use twitter/facebook at different times and it can be very helpful to tweet more than once. i actually love it when others do that as well… it makes it easier for me to see posts i would hate to miss. i don’t think it’s fair to say that’s not a good thing to practice.

    i know you know i adore and respect you to pieces which is why i feel safe disagreeing with you. i’m all for urging people to share the love and be mindful of their fellow bloggers, but none of us knows every single tweet/post/online interaction that someone might have. it’s impossible to judge what percentage of their available time they spend showing love to others and it’s unfair to dictate how much time they SHOULD be spending showing love to others.

    i have experienced first-hand how difficult it can be to read as many blogs as i’d like to. when blogging became my full-time job it brought a whole host of pressure and responsibility that has taught me so much… and i never stop learning. i consider myself to be incredibly mindful and caring of my fellow bloggers and though i may not be able to read and comment on as many blogs as i used to, i try my best and i try to show love through other ways like my monthly blog event. but just because i’m like that really doesn’t mean other people have to be as well. there are some bloggers who have completely stopped commenting on my blog even though i still comment on theirs. but i’m not mad at them. i want people to read and comment my blog because they enjoy the content, not because they feel required to.

    when i was a brand new blogger i sometimes felt negatively towards bigger bloggers because there was so much i didn’t realize yet about their blogging situation. i’m still learning, every single day. it must take so much time for them just to moderate their content/comments and respond to their inquiries while working on their blog content & living their lives on top of all that. i see how long it takes me and there are people with waayyy more traffic and followers than i have. the fact that they respond to anyone at all shows they aren’t just trying to be all about themselves. are there bloggers in the world that are selfish? sure, that’s a total possibility. but some of them still have pretty damn great content that inspires me. and that means more to me than whether they retweet my post or not.

    at the end of the day, i think we all need to spend a little more time worrying about what we’re doing right, and a little less time worrying about what other people are doing wrong. at least, that’s my take on it. and i do hope dear vahni that you don’t take any of this the wrong way because i mean it with nothing but the most genuine intentions and the desire to share the flip side of this issue.

    1. Kristy~

      I find it quite curious that within a day or so of posting this lengthy response, you unfollowed me on Twitter. I’m not sure why, since you claimed adoration and respect in your comment, even if our approaches differ. That is your choice…clearly this post hit a nerve, although it was intended as a general observation. Others who commented here and on IFB seemed to agree and take it in stride. I can only assume by the defensive nature of your response and subsequent actions that you perhaps felt it applied to you specifically.

      I do want to address two statements you made in your reply; you made references to a couple things that actually were not in the post or in my comments to others. So I want to respond to those because you misconstrued what was written.

      Regarding tweeting our own posts more than once, you wrote: “i don’t think it’s fair to say that’s not a good thing to practice.” No where in the post did I ever even mention anything related to how often you should promote your own posts/content on Twitter. In a comment reply above I mentioned that I don’t like to tweet my posts more than once, and my personal preference is that others don’t overtweet. No where did I write it’s not a good practice. It is a personal choice. I made no recommendation in this regard, in the post or in my comments. I simply wrote (in a comment reply) what my personal approach to blog post promotion is.

      You also wrote: “it’s unfair to dictate how much time they SHOULD be spending showing love to others.”

      Again, at no point did I “dictate” any amount of time anyone should spend sharing the posts of other bloggers. I wrote that part of blogging/social media is sharing others’ work, not just our own. I’m not sure how you got that inference. My whole point was that bloggers need to remember to keep it real and share. That’s it. I think if you re-read my intro, you will see that the general message was that we should get outside ourselves more often. Since fashion blogging is inherently narcissistic, I think it is very easy to get carried away promoting ourselves. I’ve seen it happen a lot. My message was that we need to remember others sometimes. When we do, it comes back tenfold.

      It is quite unfortunate that given our history and after all I did to support you when you set your sights on winning FTF, you’ve chosen to sever our relationship. That is fine. It is clear that we’ve grown apart and no longer have the same expectations or goals.


  7. oh dear.. vahni, i absolutely did not sever our relationship at all! i do respect and adore you, and as for the twitter thing i assure you that was an accident. i was attempting to fix my vogue gone rogue twitter so that it wasn’t following others and people wouldn’t think it was my primary account. but while doing that it ended up that i was still on my primary account and accidentally ended up unfollowing a bunch of people. i then went back and fixed that, but twitter being a bit on the finicky side must have errored. i hope that explains the misunderstanding!

    i think i understood your intro very well and i did read it several times. it just sounded a bit negative to me and though you may not have directly dictated either of those two points, it did came off as though you were exalting one behavior while condemning another through your tone.

    i actually did not feel that any of it applied to me personally. i’m very confident and secure in the way i interact with people online and even feel that i sometimes go to great lengths to show support that perhaps i shouldn’t, because it leaves me up all night and tired beyond belief. but whatever, that’s a personal choice. i was just playing devil’s advocate. there are a lot of blogs that i adore because of their content and the blogger has never once said a word to me. and so many people seem to be condemning that practice. blogging can be a community, but if someone doesn’t choose to participate, that doesn’t necessarily make their blog any less inspiring.

    i do hope the misunderstanding has been cleared up. i don’t sever relationships with fellow bloggers, that would be so childish. i’m very sad you took it that way. i don’t think we’ve grown apart at all and i sincerely wish you’d talk to me before taking a misunderstanding and blowing it out of proportion. and as for our expectations or goals, i’m sure they’ve always been different. we are two different people who see the world in our own way. i don’t think people need the same expectations to be friends.

    i very much still adore and respect you and i hope that feeling is still mutual.

  8. Pingback: sharde hunter
  9. Pingback: Nicole
  10. Pingback: Debbie Baker Burns
  11. Pingback: Mommy Moxie
  12. Pingback: Grit and Glamour
  13. Pingback: Grit and Glamour
  14. Pingback: Grit and Glamour
  15. Pingback: Cy Chen

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *