Sunday Coffee: Tricks, Treats, and Stirring the Pot


Happy Halloween, y’all!

The Cream

WOW. What a fantastic week in the blogosphere! I have to say that the cream of this week was publishing Why I’m Not on Weardrobe, Chictopia, Lookbook, or Hypeed, and actually getting and Hypeed’s attention. This is not an endeavor to gloat and put myself on a pedestal. I mention it because it is proof that bloggers have more power than they realize.

Really, who the hell am I? Some chick in the southeastern U.S. with a laptop, a brain, and an opinion. I’m nobody. But yet I wrote something that actually made a difference on at least one site, and on many blogs. I took a stand and people responded. That’s good. It means this medium and what we are doing makes a difference. Remember that, my lovelies. Your words can do good or harm, so think—and write—very carefully.

And to all of you who dropped by, shared your thoughts, debated, tweeted, and made your voices heard, thank you. You are always welcome here. I read every comment, and when I have time, I respond to every comment. Even if it means posting less. BECAUSE YOU MATTER.


If you’re interested in reading the ripple effect, here are responses to my post on fashion networking communities:

  • I love me. And I don’t care if you don’t. by Style Activist
    take a pledge to love you. Love your legs, your skin, your bust, your waist, everything. Don’t buy into what people want you to be. I was talking to a friend yesterday about some negative feedback that I got from a reader, and man, I was so upset. I just love to laugh and smile and then boom, there’s the negativity I was talking about. I am totally putting myself out there through my blog, allowing myself to be vulnerable to whatever people want to say and think about me. And you know what, that risk has been 100% worth it. What would we gain if we were so afraid of what people had to say about our hips, or our paragraphs, that we would hide in closets, afraid of the criticism? Nothing. So I am just going to be me, do my thing, wear my clothes and love myself and my curves. And I don’t care if you don’t.”

  • The Blog Issue—Fashion Communities by A Little Bird Told Me
    “I would, however, disagree with the description of these sites as ‘fashion communities’. The word community instills ideas of solidarity, sisterhood and collectivity, but the voting element is so juxtaposed—it forces certain members in front of others, immediately dispelling any notion of ‘togetherness’.

    And suddenly, you realise the most popular member of your community, the one with the most hypes and likes and loves, is wearing a truly heinous eskimo hat over 5 inches of black roots with a fringed waistcoat and boots that look like a horse’s hooves—someone you can’t relate to or compete with—and you think nah, this really isn’t for me.”

  • RE: Why I’m Not on Weardrobe, Chictopia, Lookbook, or Hypeed by Profresh Style
    The users are the ones in charge of voting these “beautiful people” to the top so I can’t blame the sites-it’s the industry itself. In fact, I just had a meeting with a colleague regarding designers she interns for and the problem with the designers not choosing models of color. It’s true, the tall, blond and Caucasian (or looks Caucasian) women will get the gig over women with color of the same beauty attributes.”

  • Getting serious: That weighty issue by One More
    “…I find that the more people label themselves as ‘plus size’ bloggers the more of a divide is created and people are forced to choose sides. I stopped following one blog because the posts about fashion, models, size etc were so hateful it was toxic. I loved this persons fashion posts but her hatred of thin people was just awful. I know it works both ways and I’m just not in to it. It isn’t a war. It’s fashion. I realise that this is a case of a few people ruining things for the whole bunch, but I see it more and more and I worry that this sub-sub-culture is going too far.”


The Sugar

Ioana in her Pixelated Nude Dress by Lana. Images via

Trick-or-treat!!! Well, I have to say that Ioana Liliana Gheorghe of Fashezine, pulled off both…a treat of a dress that’s actually a trick. Or maybe it’s a trick that really feels like a treat! Either way, the dress—and the post, In the nude—are sweet:

…there is one thing that I believe we should keep in mind before going (mentally) naked in front of our 500 friends. Is what you’re giving equal with what you’re gaining? Is the way in which you are exposing yourself online helping in terms of your personal development? My personal answer is a heartfelt ‘YES’, I use social networks in order to build like-minded communities, I enjoy being part of a community and I enjoy sharing my preferences with my friends and seeing theirs. Yet, I try not to forget that there is an entire world out there, and it’s beautiful, even if sometimes flawed.

Ioana is NOT nude, people. Let’s just be clear about that.


Thank you to Philli of Dusk Rising for featuring me on her blog last week, in her post, Blogger Interview: Grit and Glamour. I appreciate it, doll!


  1. Well done for writing that post V! You are amazing and I am so happy it got so much attention. I think it has a lot to do not only with those sites but deep-seated feelings within the fashion industry of what people think is beautiful and stylish!

  2. It is Sunday again, I cannot believe it…Doesn´t time fly??? Well, we must be having fun he, he he.
    I do thank you for your piece of writing about chictopia, lookbook and Hypeed. I did open my eyes, why should I have it in my free blog????? I thought it was the right thing to do when blogging. Now, thanks to you, I am much wiser.
    I have known and loved Fashezine for a while now. She is a wonderful sourcer of inspiration and a wonderful writer.
    Love your interview.
    Have a super Sunday my dear, dear friend.
    Un abrazo y mil besos siempre.

  3. Great piece on weardrobe, chictopia and Really thought provoking and interesting. Thanks so much for doing the interview 🙂

  4. happy halloween!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    my god that photo of you is HAUNTINGLY beautiful. hehehehehe, see what i did there? i used the word haunting! because it’s halloween!! (sorry i’m channeling stewie griffin… been watching so much family guy lately) =P no but seriously, i love it. i’m a sucker for good retouching effects and i think you really nailed it, especially for the halloween theme. also your flowy, drapey styling and that expression on your face are perfect.

    you’re so right, it has been a really intense week for the blogosphere. however, i disagree. you’re not no one. a woman, with a laptop and a brain and an opinion she’s not afraid to share in such an eloquent and thought-provoking way… you are one of the foundations of the fashion blogosphere in my opinion. and i’m not kidding. i remember when i first blogger met you and i was completely floored. when i didn’t really know what i was doing and felt entirely overwhelmed by this entire thing, reading your words helped guide me. though i didn’t know much i knew for sure one thing… i wanted to be a blogger with integrity. i wanted to be like V.

    so i’m not surprised that your article raised such attention. all those sites would be fools to simply ignore what you wrote. in responding, they helped us understand better what they are about, and hopefully they will keep in mind the points that you raised which are ENTIRELY in their control to fix. one of these days you’re going to be a big famous blogger, and it’s going to be really amazing because i know you will never forget about the community. =)

    1. Kristy, wow. Oh my. Thank you so very much! I sincerely appreciate your generous compliments and you KNOW I am here to help you and all my fellow bloggers if I can.

  5. So glad that your post got all the attention it deserves. You made a point which was worth making. More power and success to you! 🙂 Have a good Sunday!

  6. I did enjoy you last post a lot. Made everybody to realize that bloggers are everything instead of nothing.
    Loved those words you put out there.

    ps.. loved your photo.. still trying to figure it out the effects you’ve used but looks great V.

    Happy Halloween for you too


  7. You have such a HUGE voice in this blogging community. It’s absolutely amazing! And wow that photo up top is CREEEPPPPYYYY!! You look wonderful of course but I was totally freaked by the gostling in the corner! Very very cool doll!
    xoxox M

  8. Yes, I’m just catching up on a lot of reading now, and I see what you’ve done there… it’s fantastic!! I still have a few more to be fully updated, but it’s amazing that you took a stand and caused so much energy to be passed around…

  9. I am so far behind in blog commenting that I can’t even remember if I ever said anything “official” about your “Why I am not on…” piece. Kudos again for bringing attention to such an important topic. Even though things might not change on any of those sites, at least now there is something out there that speaks to their practices and the fact that they really aren’t as inclusive as they would like everyone to believe. Further, you brought up a very important topic when addressing the young ages of some of the users of these sites. I agree with your suggestion of bumping the age up to 16. Who knows who could be out there looking at these photos, potentially preying on these children. Bravo, my dear!

    It’s a shame that Chictopia never responded, but the fact that the other two sites did is a real testament to the power of bloggers. Not just any bloggers – bloggers like you who aren’t afraid to stir the pot and bring attention to real issues. Congrats again on a job well, well done!

    Now, onto the rest of this post – that photo is fantastic. I love the ghost effect. I’d love it if you one day shared what editing programs you use for your images. They are genius, really. And thanks for pointing out that piece by Ioana Liliana Gheorghe. That dress is fascinating!

    1. Thank you, B, for your comment and the compliment. We’re in agreement on the fashion community issues….and the power of bloggers!

      Regarding the photo editing software, I use Sooooo easy. It’s like Photoshop for dummies. I paid to access premium services and it has been well worth it.

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