Thanks, Audrina…

for a couple of things.

First, for strolling around Sydney and Bondi in black patent stilettos. Thank you for wearing proper shoes and not “thongs.” Thank you for looking squeaky-clean casual dressy, in classic California style, cause that’s what ya’ll do best. Below is my favorite photo of Audrina down Under, and no, I seriously did NOT crop it myself. I suspect some Aussie papparazzo was so astonished that Audrina was in Bondi fully-clothed, in proper shoes that he couldn’t help but capture THAT Kodak moment. Does my heart good.

Second, my sweet Audrina, thank you for proclaiming Sydney “the best place in the world,” or something to that effect. Although I was dead serious about thank you #1 above, this one causes me anguish. I spoke to my husband today and he promptly informed me that one of our “American movie stars” (not quite) had made the statement.

Oy vey. OK, like I soooo want to feel the same, but I’m not there yet. Of course, when you’re flitting around Bondi and Sydney and staying in five-star hotels with those views, yes indeed, it is fabulous. I love it myself. But there aren’t many cities I wouldn’t like with a limo, concierge, and bag bitch at my service. Anyway, I’m sure one day I’ll get there. I’m going to try to leave my jaded attitude in the States when I fly off to Oz this next time.

And one more thing. Audrina, you are a beautiful girl no matter what color your hair is. But the highlights are so average. Expected. PLEASE go back to your gorgeous dark brown locks! Please stay the hell out of the sun! And the Mystic-Tan booth…cause in those Divine Rights of Denim ads, you are stunning! I mean, God daaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaang! (Forgive me, Lord. But I’ve got to give the girl props.)

Audri rockin’ her Divine Rights…

PS: I’m still excited to be heading back to Sydney in two weeks!

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