So I’m on a little family errand today with my sister-in-law, three-year-old nephew, and nine-month-old niece. Destination: Costco, perhaps Babies-R-Us (ugh). After we get the kids and the snacks and the toys loaded in the car, my sister-in-law starts telling me about something funny her son said the other day.
She was having a conversation about the fact that there are different genders in the world…some of us are boys, some girls. At the time, she was putting on makeup, and her son wanted to put some on as well. So she launched into the whole little-boys-don’t-wear-makeup lecture, which brought on the gender conversation.
“Xan,” she says, “boys don’t wear makeup. You’re a boy, so you don’t wear makeup. Daddy’s a boy too. And mommy and Lili are girls,” she continues.
Then, she asks, “What is Yiayia [grandmother], Xan, is she a boy or a girl?”
“A girl!” Xan responds.
“That’s right, baby! What about Papouli, is he a boy or a girl?
“A boy!”
“Very good, Xan!” she says.
And Tia [thia, aunt], what is Tia?” she asks again.
“A bad girl,” Xan answers.
Now tell me how my three-year-old nephew already knows I’m not of the sugar-and-spice-and-everything-nice ilk? This kid is going to do very well in about 13 years.
Continuing on, we’re still en route to Costo, and we decide to detour at Panera Bread, which happens to be in the same complex as my nephew’s fave, Target.
As we pull into the lot to stop for lunch, Xan spots the Target bullseye logo. I swear he can spot it from a mile away. For him, Target is like Mecca. ‘Cause he knows that if he doesn’t give his mommy too much shit, a new member of the Thomas the Train family will be going home with him. Thus, upon seeing Target, he immediately exclaims, “Target! Target! I want to go to Target!”
His mother and I reply, in unison, that no, we are not going to Target. We are starving, and we are going to Panera, and that’s that.
“I want Target! Toys!” he says.
“We’re not going to Target!” I respond.
“Let’s go to Target!” he counters. “Money is no object!”
WTF????????
This from the mouth of a three-year-old? Verbatim, people. 100% true, cross my heart. Money is no object…music to my ears. This kid reads me like a book. It’s astonishing.
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